Giving gifts to members of the wedding and other special guests is a time-honored way of showing thanks and sharing joy. It's customary to present a token of appreciation to bridesmaids, ushers, flower girls, ringer bearers, readers and parents, as well as anyone else who helps make your wedding day special. Basically, you have three gift-giving options.
- Find those two great gifts (his and hers) you're sure everyone will love, and buy in bulk. The larger the bridal party, the more couples like this idea. It usually works out well because friends are drawn together by similar interests. Box seats for the hottest game in town may be more welcome by the guys than money clips. But if your buddies are bankers or accountants, engraved sterling silver money clips may get the oohs and aahs.
- Present your maid or matron of honor and best man with something different. If you have a large bridal party, but you'd like to thank the people who offered the most help with something special, this is the way to go. Stick with the bulk gifts for the rest of the bridal party, but choose personalized gifts for the two most important people in your bridal party.
- Select individualized gifts for each member of the wedding. Of course, this is easiest to do with smaller bridal parties. If you're tuned into the interests and hobbies of your bridesmaids and groomsmen, surprise them with personalized presents. Software for a computer freak, frames or film for a photo bug and dinner gift certificates for food aficionados are all welcome gifts.
Great gifts
Whether you're buying for a crowd or simply need a couple of special things, use this list for inspiration. One last note: the his—and-hers columns are loose guides. Don't be afraid to break through the gender barrier. Your maid-of-honor may appreciate a beautifully monogrammed silver-plated business card case. Your best man may have always wanted a facial, but never had the nerve. You get the picture.
HERS
- Perfume and/or atomizers
- Cosmetic brushes
- Porcelain, silver or crystal keepsakes
- Wedding day jewelry
- Top-quality brush/comb sets
- Picture frames
- Spa gift certificates
- Concert tickets
- Magazine subscriptions
- Flower-of-the-month club
- Gourmet teas or coffees
- Massages or facials
- Body-care goody baskets
- Gift certificates
- Candlesticks
- Personalized stationery
- Accessory boxes
HIS
- Silver-plated card cases
- Deluxe Swiss army knives
- Golf accessories or club date
- Really good sunglasses
- Cufflinks
- Martini or margarita sets
- Wines
- Beer- or cigar-of-the-month club
- Shaving kits
- Music gift certificates
- Tools for the handy types
- Wallets
- Money clips
- Gift certificates
Something different
If you're planning a theme wedding, think of a gift in keeping with the topic. Going nautical? Give seashell picture frames or golden knot cuff links. Marrying around a holiday? Wrap up elegant tree ornaments for a wintry wedding or cool sunglasses for one near the Fourth of July. (You get the idea.) Many gifts lend themselves to monogramming—a great way to personalize your selections. Silver key chains, money clips and compacts are just a few of the shimmering items that can be engraved with the recipient's initials. Some brides take into account that their attendants' wedding-related expenses can quickly add up—from a possible plane ticket down to a dress and shoes—and offer to defray some of those costs by helping to pay for the outfit, hotel room and so on. For many bridesmaids, that can be the most-welcome gift of all.
When to give
Gifts are traditionally presented to the bridesmaids at a luncheon or party held before the wedding day. The groom usually gives gifts to his ushers at the rehearsal dinner. (Just go the route that works best for you!) And don't forget to tuck a personalized card inside each one.
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